Wednesday, September 4, 2013

I'm a shy person...

 
I'm a shy person. I've always been very quiet and unsure of myself when I meet someone new. When I'm around a group of people I'm usually the quietest one. I've never liked being the center of attention either and if I ever am my hands begin to shake, my heart beats twice as fast, and my legs feel like jello. I can only imagine how red my face gets from being embarrassed, nervous, and worried that I might say something that sounds dumb. I'm even shy to make a payment over the phone cause that would mean I have to speak to someone I don't know!

Lately I've been trying to overcome my shyness by forcing myself to do things I wouldn't normally do willingly. I made a phone call to pay a bill without fumbling my words for the first time about a month ago. That was an accomplishment I'm very proud of :)  When I started school again I made it a point to talk to people I didn't know. And you know what? I actually met some really nice people! I did come across some not-so-kind classmates, but the nice definitely outnumbered them. Every day I've been getting better at not second guessing myself so much, but there's one thing I still struggle with...

Commenting on other blogs.

Do you find it weird that I get shy to comment on other blogs? I don't know what it is but I get so nervous to click the "publish" button after I've typed up a comment. I just freeze up. There've been countless times that I've just moved on without leaving something to let the blogger know I agreed with what they were saying, congratulating them on an accomplishment, or just to say hi. I know how great it feels to sign into my blog and see that I have a comment waiting to be published, so I know that other bloggers love that feeling, too. But sometimes I just can't get myself to leave a comment! Especially when it's a blog I just started following. My thought process while debating on whether or not to leave one kind of goes like this.. "Oh gosh that sounds so dumb." "They're not gonna understand what you mean by that!" "There are so many grammatical errors here." "They don't know you and will probably wonder why you're here!" .. Yeah, there's a lot more but this post would be way too long :)

I just wanted to see if there's anyone else out there who kinda sorta feels the same way? Blogging has definitely helped me come out of my shell. I never would have thought that I'd be able to have a twitter convo with a fellow blogger or an author. And it's great to have met a lot of awesome people in the book blogging world who are so nice and encouraging. Being shy about commenting is something I hope to get over someday. Even as I'm typing this post I'm trying to decide whether or not I'll actually publish it.. Maybe writing this is a step closer to getting over this fear and shyness?

One more thing...
I know I wouldn't be able overcome my fears(and I'm not just talking about commenting) without God's help. A verse I want to end this post with is one I find I'm always going back to..
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."
- 2 Timothy 1:7

20 comments:

  1. What an honest post. I love how you just came out with it. Don't think that you're the only shy blogger out there. I used to struggle with that. but since I've been more open on my blog have become more outgoing.
    I love when anyone comments on my blog (and I'm certainly not the only one)...grammatically correct or not..LOL.

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    1. Thank you, Julie! It's nice to know that I'm not alone in this :D I'm trying to be more open on my blog too and I think I just took the first step!

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  2. Awwww *hug*
    You should start by commenting on blogs were you can tell the blogger is really nice.
    Like as a way to dip your toes in the water.

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    1. Thank you for the advice, Juju! I'll definitely be doing that :D

      I'll be honest, it made me even more nervous about replying to your comment cause you're such a popular blogger! Lol! :)

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  3. One more thing: Christian bloggers IMO are some of the sweetest folks I've ever met. Just a suggestion. Good luck! :)

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    1. I completely agree with you! Most of the bloggers I've become friends with are Christian :)

      Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment!

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  4. Hi Crystal! I can totally relate. I'm good with one on one conversation but with lots of people around I freeze! I'm learning that my introvertedness is ok though. That God made me this way and he doesn't make mistakes. We are all unique and God can use us just the way we are. : )

    Feel free to come by my blog and comment anytime, I'd love to hear what you think! Thanks for your honest post. Loved it. : )

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    1. Thank you so much for your encouraging comment, Cathy! It sounds like we're a lot alike :)

      "I'm learning that my introvertedness is ok though. That God made me this way and he doesn't make mistakes." - I love that! And it's so true.

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  5. I've always been kind of shy in person, and on the phone even. But the internet has helped me, I feel it is easier to talk to people online. Other than a couple of bloggers on Twitter who did make me feel bad, that is very rare! Most bloggers I follow and talk to online are sooooo nice! Thanks for sharing this with us, and good luck as you continue to work on it!

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    1. I feel it's easier to talk to someone online, too. I'm sorry you had a bad experience with those bloggers.. I guess some people feel it's easier to be mean online cause they get to hide behind a computer screen. I hope you continue to come across nothing but nice bloggers from here on out :)

      Thank you for your comment! It's great to see that there are more people than I thought who can relate to feeling this way :D

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  6. In "real" life, I am VERY much like this, Crystal. Unless I am around people I know really well, rarely anything out of my mouth makes... sense. If it's a first meeting that is brief enough to involve only a handshake and "nice to meet you," I am okay too but beyond that... yep, I'm kinda' "reserved" and believe me, I don't like being that way because I'm not a person who wants to come across as "rude" and sometimes being reserved can. Time and maturity has helped and this can also be applied to blogging...

    I don't think I've ever felt shy to comment on blogs - perhaps in the beginning but I've since pushed past that. Writing is my outlet! Which is hopefully where I am always able to express myself. It can be hard to articulate opinions so you are not alone in that, girl. Thanks for this honesty and lovely post - nice job!

    Always know that you're most welcome to comment on my little corner of the web anytime - I don't always promise that my awesome readers and I agree, however we are very respectful and mindful of the others opinions. :)

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    1. Wow thank you so much for that! Coming across as being rude is something I've always worried about.. since I started to push myself to do things I would normally hide from, I've been better at meeting new people and not being so nervous to say more than just "Hello"

      When it comes to blogging, commenting, and tweeting I feel like I can't always express what I'm trying to say clearly. And my fear is not making any sense.. but I do believe I can get past this insecurity with time. Especially after seeing all these encouraging comments. I really didn't even expect one person to comment on this post, so all the ones I've gotten is such a blessing!

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  7. Hey Crystal! Great post -- I can totally relate to being shy. I typically hate making phone calls, get nervous when meeting/talking to new people, etc.

    Thanks for sharing and, as I said, great post! :)

    Melanie

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    1. Thank you so much, Melanie! It's so encouraging to see that others can relate, especially the phone call thing :D


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  8. I could cry!!! In fact, I feel some tears welling up here. Oh, my goodness, you may not know me in real life Crystal but I have a side of me that is so much like you!! I really do. And if you don't mind, I'll wrap 'my virtual arms' around you right now and send you a hug :). We all understand, Crystal. So, so understand. In fact, I've noticed a tendency.. Avid readers tend to be introverts and introverts are often shy people. Sometimes even the most outgoing person in a group can be underneath it all very, very shy.- Surprising, eh? :) Believe me, no one on earth is without insecurities. Before I go on and on, if you don't mind, I'd like to suggest you a book I read. It's called 'So Long Insecurity' by Beth Moore. I have read and re-read that one and I can tell you that as a shy person I found a lot that resonated with me. I've read few books that were more relatable than that one. Reading it is like having a conversation with a fellow good, Christ-following sister in the Lord and Beth is purely a generous and kind soul. If you haven't read it - maybe it might help?

    I'm so glad you're taking steps toward become less and less shy! Anytime you feel like commenting, believe me, all of us Christian bloggers are ready to welcome you with nothing but open and genuine kindness. So appreciate this post. Bless you!!!

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    1. Ganice! Your virtual hug is much appreciated :) Thank you!

      You have no idea what a wonderful blessing your comment is. It made me tear up a bit! It's so nice to know that someone else can relate, even to a certain extent, to what I feel. And you're SO right about Avid readers being introverts and often shy. For me, it's a lot easier to meet and get to know fictional characters than actual people in the real world. It's not as nerve-wracking I guess.

      Thank you for the book suggestion, I will definitely check it out :) The author's name does sound familiar, I think I might have read one of her books before.

      And no worries on the double comment :D Thanks again for your lovely words of encouragement! I appreciate it!

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    2. Thank you! :D I'm so glad! It's my pleasure and privilege to encourage you :)

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  9. Oh, sorry! I thought blogger ate it! Sorry for commenting twice!

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  10. Fantastic post! I am shy and nervous but try and hide it. People now think I'm confident but the shyness is still there. It took me 3 wks to say hello to my now husband. It does get easier the more you do it. Congrats for facing everything and working your way through it.

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  11. Great post Crystal! You're so right, bloggers do love to get kind and/or thoughtful comments on their blogs (I know I do), but I have done the same thing with comments so many times! I'll have a comment all written up with lots of thoughts then way over think what I wrote and either not comment at all or super simplify it, which I hate but I get so nervous. I used to dread having to make phone calls and talking to people (unless I knew them really well) so much that I would be shaking on the inside, my heart racing, etc.. I still struggle with the nerves and it's something that I constantly have to work on, but it has been getting a better. Glad to hear that you've been able to work through it and have met some nice people :)

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